Dear Paula,

How are you? Me? I'm doing well. I'm 26 years old now. It's taken some time, but I'm one semester away from graduating college, the first in my family! A few years ago I moved far away enough from home to be "on my own", but close enough to go back when I needed to. I will be making another big move soon, this time pushing myself even more, allowing God to fully lead me. He has already shown me parts of the path, it's a faith building one for sure!

I just wanted to take this time to tell you...

It's okay that when you were 17 you didn't know what to do with a baby. It's okay that you did the only thing you knew how to do, and you gave me to a responsible adult.

I promise, it's okay. 

Actually, it's more than okay.

You see, I've grown into a strong independent woman. I've made my share of mistakes, sure. But I've also found the grace of The Lord. I am confident in who I am in Him, and what He is calling me to do. I am bold in my faith. I am passionate about loving people. I am nurturing, I am protective, I am compassionate. I get fired up about animals that don't have a home and orphans in foreign lands. I cry proud tears when I hear the National Anthem, and I've made a vow to my Lord to not let this be the only nation I proudly serve. My deepest desire is for people to know and fall in love with my Jesus.

I am all of these things because you placed me in the care of someone who taught me how to be all of that, someone who also saw the importance in allowing others to help teach me along the way.

I guess you can say, I am all of these things partly because of you.

You knew your limits and didn't place any on me by keeping me in an environment that was unhealthy. For that, I have to say thank you. Thank you for knowing your daughter was better off in the care of someone who could fully provide for her.

The last time I spoke to you, I said some hurtful things. I want you to know, I didn't really mean it. I was younger then, I didn't understand all you had done for me by not doing anything at all. I couldn't see the bigger picture of your love for me, by allowing me to grow in someone else's home. Allowing me to flourish under the care of someone other than yourself. Most would believe, you did a selfless thing. I now see that too. I see the sacrifice you made by placing me elsewhere, not knowing how I would turn out.

I've turned out okay. Some would say, good even.

I can't wait to be a mom, too. I hope to have a house full one day. When that happens, I promise I will teach them to be good. I will teach them to love the Lord. I will show them how to serve others. 

You've crossed my mind so many times before today. I wondered if I ever crossed yours? I've thought it through time and time again, what I would say to you if there was ever another "chance" encounter between you and me. I still don't know for sure, which is why I am now taking this time to tell you of the life you gave me. 

Just in case you were wondering about me. I have a good life. A happy life. It is filled with a lot of laughter and copious amounts of love.

I have been blessed.

When I think of you now, I promise I will think of all the happy moments you gave to me by giving me away. I will think of you with gratitude for the life I live. 

My many thanks,

Kris